Bullying

One might wonder where this post is coming from, but as I sit here tonight putting fall fabric together it all comes back.

As far back as I can remember, I had a fashion sense. I would make sure things matched and put colors together. I'm a very matchy matchy type of girl, so I don't often venture out of my comfort zone and put colors together that really aren't matchy matchy, but when I do, I enjoy it.

When I was in the 7th grade, I was bullied. I didn't realize it until much later in life, but 30 years later, I realize how much bullying does affect a person and how raw it still is. Hard to believe, but it is still so raw.

I always had to match my clothes and I had a pair of light purple corduroy overalls which I matched plaid blouse with. The plaid was purple, lavender, black and tan. The overalls were very comfy with big pockets on the front. Hard to believe I can still remember that outfit, but it is there in my mind. My favorite shoes were tan suede mary janes. I loved those shoes. Oh how I loved those shoes. I really really loved them. All of 13yrs old, awkward, but had a fashion sense, or so I thought.

I only wore that outfit one time. I was passed a note by someone, no idea who that called me a "N" lover. Really??? I learned a lot that day about prejudice and that just because I wore an outfit that was out of the ordinary, I was considered a "N" lover. I have no idea who sent the note, but I learned that I had a group of haters. Oh, they really didn't like me and I have do have an idea why. I learned that you never ever write anything about the popular kids. Someone who you trust will take what you write to get themselves into the popular group and they did. Suddenly she was in and I was out. I was out in a big way too.

I was tormented in the hall, I was tormented at home. They would call me and say mean horrible things. They would ignore me and they even threated to beat me up. Why?

I had no friends at lunch. I would go to the library during lunch and sneak in a candy bar so I didn't have to go down those halls and sit by myself in the cafeteria and listen to all of them say things about me. They even broke my shoe. Stepped on the back of my heel and snapped that little strap. Never will I forget that day.

Some of these people are my "FB friends" and I'm sure they don't remember this happening as it wasn't them who was being tormented. Funny thing is that after all of this, I was eventually let back in the popular crowd. Not too sure why, but I even got invited to the popular party. I will never understand the minds of 13yr olds, but I can learn from this and work very hard to protect my daughter who is turning into a young teen herself.

Back to designing fall and I'm putting Plum knit fabric with Turquoise and Purple fabrics! I'll show them!!